Catching Up? Let Me Tell You About This Burger

Okay, so imagine this: it’s Wednesday, you’re hungry, and you need something that feels like a treat but doesn’t require culinary wizardry. That’s pretty much how the Cheesy Crack Burger became my thing. The first time I made it, I actually burnt the buns (distracted by my dog chasing his tail—honestly, who can blame him?). But even then, everyone still raved, cheese oozing, sauce everywhere. It’s that kinda burger. Also, apologies in advance if you end up with cheese on your elbow. Sometimes I do, and I just call it a bonus.

Why You'll Love This (Or: Why I Keep Making It)

I whip this up when the craving for something cheesy and over-the-top hits (which, let’s be real, is way too often). My partner practically does a happy dance when I say it’s Cheesy Crack Burger night. The kids? They beg for seconds, even though they pretend they’re too cool for food enthusiasm. And honestly, if I’m short on time, this is my go-to because it’s not fussy—plus, the cleanup isn’t half as bad as you’d think. Well, unless you’re as messy as I am, then maybe have a sponge handy.

Here's What You'll Need (and What I Swap In)

500g ground beef (or turkey when my wallet’s feeling light—works fine)
1 cup shredded cheddar (my gran swore by Red Leicester, but cheddar works, or mozzarella if you must)
4 burger buns (brioche is best, but I’ve used sandwich bread in a pinch and nobody rioted)
½ cup crispy fried onions (I sometimes just use regular sautéed onions, lazy days, you know?)
1-2 tablespoon burger sauce (store-bought is fine, or try this DIY one)
3-4 slices cooked bacon, optional (but not really optional for my crew)
Salt and pepper, to taste (I’m heavy-handed with pepper, but you do you)

How I Throw It Together (More or Less)

First, shape the ground beef into four patties—don’t overthink it, just press together lightly. Salt and pepper both sides (I always forget one side, don’t be like me).
Heat your trusty frying pan (or grill if you’re feeling fancy) over medium-high. Add the patties. Cook 3-4 minutes per side, until they’re getting that good brown crust—here’s where I usually sneak a tiny taste. If you like your burgers less pink, go another minute or so.
When you flip the patties, pile on the shredded cheese so it melts all gooey. Don’t panic if it slides off, just scoop it back up—cheese is forgiving (mostly).
While the cheese melts, toast your buns (I sometimes do this directly on the pan—saves time, probably sacrilege, but whatever).
Assemble time: bun, patty, crispy onions, bacon, healthy squeeze of burger sauce, lid. Maybe a lettuce leaf if you fancy, but honestly, why?

And boom, you’re done. Don’t worry if it looks a bit wild; messy burgers always taste better, right?

Stuff I’ve Learned The Hard Way (Notes)

If you use super lean beef, it’ll be a bit drier. Actually, I find 80/20 beef the sweet spot.
The cheese goes on after the flip—tried it before once and, wow, cheese everywhere but the patty.
Regular onions are fine if you don’t have crispy ones, but you’ll miss that crunch (just my two cents).

Things I’ve Tried (Burger Experiments, Some Odd)

Adding hot sauce to the cheese—it’s actually pretty great if you like a kick.
Swapping in blue cheese. Wasn’t my favourite, but maybe you’ll like it?
Tried a veggie version with black bean patties once. Tasty, but not quite the same craving-smasher.

Don’t Have The "Right" Gear?

I usually use my cast iron pan (it’s my kitchen MVP), but honestly, any sturdy frying pan works. No grill? No worries. I’ve even done these under the broiler—just watch so they don’t get too charred. Sheet pan burgers in the oven are a thing too (check this BA guide for inspo).

Where to Stash Leftovers

In theory, you could keep leftovers in the fridge, tightly wrapped, for up to 2 days. But, truthfully, in our house these never make it past breakfast the next day. They do reheat surprisingly well in a pan, though I’d avoid the microwave—turns the buns to rubber.

How We Like to Serve It (Maybe You’ll Steal This Idea)

We do ours with a big pile of kettle chips and a pickle on the side. If it’s a particularly lazy Saturday, I’ll just throw on some oven fries and call it a meal. My friend swears by dipping hers in ranch, which is just wild enough to work. Oh, and a cold ginger beer? Chef’s kiss.

Stuff I Learned The Hard Way (Pro Tips)

Don’t rush to flip the patties—you want that brown crust. I once tried to speed things up and ended up with sad, grey burgers. Never again.
Be generous with the cheese. Skimping isn’t allowed here (unless you’re out, in which case, see substitutions!).
Actually, set out all toppings before you cook. Otherwise you’ll just end up scrambling and dropping onions everywhere. Ask me how I know.

Wait, So... Burger FAQ (Questions from My Inbox)

Can I freeze the patties? Yep, before cooking is best. I usually layer them with baking paper, pop in a bag, and forget about them for weeks.
What can I use instead of crispy onions? Regular fried onions, or even those fried shallots you get at Asian markets—honestly, anything crunchy.
Is there a way to make this less messy? Uh, not really. But that’s part of the charm, right? Just arm yourself with napkins.
Can I use a plant-based patty? I’ve tried (see experiments above)—it works, but you’ll want to amp up the seasoning and cheese, I think.
Why is it called Crack Burger? Not sure, but I suppose it’s because it’s kind of addictive. I mean, try eating just one, I dare you!

Okay, bit of a tangent: I once made these after a long day of hiking, and for some reason the cheese tasted even cheesier. Maybe everything tastes better when you’re tired, or maybe it’s just this burger. Anyway, hope you enjoy it as much as we do. Shout if you try something new—love hearing other folks’ twists!

Cheesy Crack Burger